A locomotive.
If such a Red Sox team existed (conditional for personal, idiosyncratic, irrational reasons) its hallmark would be brutal efficiency. Reminiscent of the best NYY teams and very similar to the Bobby Cox Braves machines.
You have a four-game series in Baltimore — we got this. No screwing around with 3-1, much less the old can’t-stand-prosperity 2-2 RS would have posted years ago. No, a fucking sweep. Because the situation demands it with the looming schedule, and because you’re playing a AAA team.
So no, “you gotta tip your cap.” Or, “they get paid too.” Or, “it’s a long season.” Or, “the disappointing split is a statistical anomaly — calm down.”
No, a fucking sweep. That’s new, it’s different for us, it’s bloodless and it’s beautiful.