Why Do I Continue to Read Peter King?

Dollar

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The picture link above isn't working, but my guess is Peter and family, all smiles, in front of the main gate at Dachau.
 

Darnell's Son

He's a machine.
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Internet Messageboard Fact that may only interest me:

Corsi is having issues posting a picture in the Peter King thread in the Our Errors and Mistakes forum on the popular message board site Sons of Sam Horn.
 

Corsi

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[quote name='Darnell's Son' timestamp='1342415556' post='4238250']
Internet Messageboard Fact that may only interest me:

Corsi is having issues posting a picture in the Peter King thread in the Our Errors and Mistakes forum on the popular message board site Sons of Sam Horn.
[/quote]

Arrrgh. It keeps showing up, then somehow going away.

One more try.

 

Stevie1der

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I keep having these visceral thoughts of smashing them all with a baseball bat, but for some reason "The Sorcerer's Apprentice" music keeps popping into my head and I start shivering uncontrollably.
 

Alcohol&Overcalls

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Is there no other way to say "Hey, this bobblehead is a writer!" than to awkwardly jam a pen and pad into his hands? Aside from the fact that King hasn't done any of that type of reporting since AIDS was called GRID, it creates a totally surreal and creepy statuette.

The grin doesn't help.
 

Corsi

isn't shy about blowing his wad early
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Is there no other way to say "Hey, this bobblehead is a writer!" than to awkwardly jam a pen and pad into his hands? Aside from the fact that King hasn't done any of that type of reporting since AIDS was called GRID, it creates a totally surreal and creepy statuette.
 

John Marzano Olympic Hero

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One day, a long time from now, future historians are going to come across a cache of bobbleheads and they're going to wonder what they were, what they represented and what that person did in order to get this tribute.

They're going to be awfully sad when they realize that the Lowell Spinners honored a man who spends every Sunday night writing about watered-down coffee, pedestrian types of beer and his kids' softball games.

"Where are the Bill Gates, Albert Einstein or Nelson Mandella bobbleheads," they'll wonder.
 

JohntheBaptist

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One day, a long time from now, future historians are going to come across a cache of bobbleheads and they're going to wonder what they were, what they represented and what that person did in order to get this tribute.

They're going to be awfully sad when they realize that the Lowell Spinners honored a man who spends every Sunday night writing about watered-down coffee, pedestrian types of beer and his kids' softball games.

"Where are the Bill Gates, Albert Einstein or Nelson Mandella bobbleheads," they'll wonder.
Boss, I did the research.
And?
Um...
What?
Maybe I should take some more time with it, I--
Out with it, Johnson!
Well, all the ones we found in Room A were athletes. Mostly very prominent ones. The ones you asked about, the chubby one with the asshole face and the writing tablet and instrument?
Yes... King?
Right. King. He, uh. Was a writer.
Ok.
He wrote about football. And coffee. He seems, from the cultural research we've done, to have been a bit... stupid. Remember the briefing I gave you on Rick Reilly? Well Mr. King did get text messages from Brett Favre. Still.
Interesting. A bobblehead? And theres so many of them.
He actually complained, in one of his "columns," about a woman asking for a blanket while on one of those "airplanes" they used to use.
You're kidding me.
I'm not.
Well, we know their propensity for satire. Perhaps this was a parody of some sort?
That's what we're looking into, sir.
 

Smiling Joe Hesketh

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Hey @SI_PeterKing we heard you're the "Guest in the Chair" tonight, good luck on the #Fenway mic!
Why the FUCK are they doing this? He's not a serious candidate for the job. He's not a baseball writer. He doesn't have good pipes.

What a fucking farce this organization has become.
 

DJnVa

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Dec 16, 2010
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Well, the Sox didn't intend for it to be only true candidates.

http://espn.go.com/b...me-pa-announcer

There are people we're going to invite who don't have interest in this long term. They want to, first and foremost, pay tribute to Carl. And secondly, experience what it's like to sit in the best seat in the house
I wonder if King knew Beane.

But yeah, it's just an incestuous profession--someone knows someone that knows King and he said he'd love to do it and now the Sox will get a fawning mention in a future column.

They should give nights behind the mic to charity if they are going to have non-professionals there anyway. Donation of a certain amount gets you a night.
 

John Marzano Olympic Hero

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Why the FUCK are they doing this? He's not a serious candidate for the job. He's not a baseball writer. He doesn't have good pipes.

What a fucking farce this organization has become.
First Meterperell and now this? It's getting harder and harder to like this fucking team.


[Dentist]DURRRR, I have a great idea! Let's get fuckface Peter King in the chair to announce the batters! Think of all the good will we'll get in Monday Morning Quarterback AND another person can check off something on his bucket list! [/Dentist]

God, this sucks.
 

JohntheBaptist

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I will never forget the time I saw King at Fenway at the Souvenir Store. He had a backpack on hiked up tight and was standing on his tip-toes to see over the kids as he picked a foam finger. I knew his face but I'd never read his column at that point, actually.

We're getting a few pages of self-serving humblebrag on this one for sure.
 

Reverend

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Maybe he'll the crowd when it is and is not appropriate to cheer.
 

Leather

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Or maybe he'll complain that the seat wasn't very comfortable, or that it was a few degrees too warm, or (more likely) that he could only get Bud products and not a Sam Adams, a la his petty bitchings about staying in hotels that most of us can't afford.
 

Vandalman

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Peter King ‏@SI_PeterKing
Looking for parents of young boys deciding whether to let sons play football. Email me w/brief info+contact phone at si.peterking@gmail.com.</p>



Peter King &rlm;@SI_PeterKing
Or if you've decided either to allow or not allow your son to play ... Info and phone number to si.peterking@gmail.com




I'm tempted to respond to these tweets just so I can (maybe) talk with PETER KING on the phone. The line forms behind me.
 

E5 Yaz

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My sons are 3 months old. Should I send it to him?
Of course. You could totally sell him on the notion that you will raise your children in such a way as to reject football, either as a player or a fan, and to pursue only non-contact sports.
 

Leather

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Or that I'm going to let them play, but only as one person. Rotate them game to game, to reduce wear and tear.
 

Shelterdog

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How about "I wasn't going to let them play ball, but after seeing you talk about how great the Gronk brothers are I realized that it's worth the risk."
 

CoffeeNerdness

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Tell him they're tough as nails because you've been putting espresso and Shock Top in their formula since they were 2 months old.
 

Turrable

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Give him a passionate 30 minute interview before making it clear that you thought he was talking about soccer