Game 5: Sixers at Boston: Lobster Rolls > Cheese Steaks

Bernie Carbohydrate

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One time I was in the City of Brotherly Love for work and had to stay in a fancy downtown hotel. Looking for a quick lunch, I asked at the desk for directions to a sandwich shop.

The clerk spits out some garbled phrases in that atrocious Philly accent, pointing down the street.

I find the joint. It’s one of those “famous” cheesesteak shops. They got news clippings taped to the window about how they are one of the “true” old school sandwich shops. It was touching how much this distinction mattered to them, like being the smartest kid on the short bus.

So I figure when in Rome, and order a classic cheesesteak. And I watch as the grill-jockey builds my sandwich, this famous delicacy, and reaches for a can of Cheez Wizz.

They did not have real cheese. Like the fellow didn’t cook up the meat then lay down a couple of slices of provolone, or even American cheese, in a civilized manner. This scrapple-chewing coxcomb busted out the Cheez Wizz.

Fuck Philly with Ben Franklin’s poxy flesh baguette.
 

Al Zarilla

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Dec 8, 2005
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One time I was in the City of Brotherly Love for work and had to stay in a fancy downtown hotel. Looking for a quick lunch, I asked at the desk for directions to a sandwich shop.

The clerk spits out some garbled phrases in that atrocious Philly accent, pointing down the street.

I find the joint. It’s one of those “famous” cheesesteak shops. They got news clippings taped to the window about how they are one of the “true” old school sandwich shops. It was touching how much this distinction mattered to them, like being the smartest kid on the short bus.

So I figure when in Rome, and order a classic cheesesteak. And I watch as the grill-jockey builds my sandwich, this famous delicacy, and reaches for a can of Cheez Wizz.

They did not have real cheese. Like the fellow didn’t cook up the meat then lay down a couple of slices of provolone, or even American cheese, in a civilized manner. This scrapple-chewing coxcomb busted out the Cheez Wizz.

Fuck Philly with Ben Franklin’s poxy flesh baguette.
That's what they use, right? (Cheese Whiz). It'd be like you're in an Italian restaurant and you ask for a side of pasta and they open a can of Chef Boyardee or Franco-American. Like, such a place never existed.
 

Bernie Carbohydrate

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That's what they use, right? (Cheese Whiz). It'd be like you're in an Italian restaurant and you ask for a side of pasta and they open a can of Chef Boyardee or Franco-American. Like, such a place never existed.
Al, I was was shocked. It was like the were proud of it. What a fucking fraud. It's the Harden-snapping-his-head-back-on-an-uncontested-three of sandwiches.
 

TrapperAB

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Make Doc sick

Let people associate the double-i in Embiid’s name with the round he leaves the playoffs

Make Doris Burke weep knowing that our lord and savior James Harden will be eating at Houston strip club buffets this summer.

Destroy Tyrese so thoroughly that his next team will be able to get the Max for the Minimum.
 

terrynever

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Can’t you guys just appreciate we are watching a quality series between two strong teams?
 

Time to Mo Vaughn

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I will be in attendance tonight and can't fucking wait. First time I'm attending a Celtics playoff game. Gonna do my part to ensure the garden is rocking tonight.
 

sezwho

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I don't believe I've ever had cheese whiz in my life. Always seemed so disgusting.
Cheez whiz can have a place in the world, usually with ritz crackers and bacon bitz (all of which are largely petroleum jelly and none of which have actual food content) but that place is not on any kind of decent cheese steak. I did not say cheezsteak.

Philly will produce as many wins as Pats and Genos produce great steak sandwiches tonight combined. Zero.
 

Curt S Loew

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Cheez whiz can have a place in the world, usually with ritz crackers and bacon bitz.
Are you thinking of "Easy Cheese" or do you dunk your Ritz Crackers in that stuff?

It's horrible, just like Philadelphia. Perfect for each other.
 

sezwho

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Are you thinking of "Easy Cheese" or do you dunk your Ritz Crackers in that stuff?

It's horrible, just like Philadelphia. Perfect for each other.
I'm not able to upload the picture (I know..pics or it didn't happen ; ) but at one point you could by as spray cans! I see its only easy cheese now though...time marches on.

64547

I did see this alternate use for Whiz in Philly.

https://nypost.com/2023/02/11/porn-site-camsoda-sending-cheez-whiz-lube-to-philadelphia/

Edit..
 

Curt S Loew

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I'm not able to upload the picture here (I know..pics or it didn't happen ; ) but at one point you could by as spray cans! I see its only easy cheese now though...time marches on.
Yeah. I figured you meant the stuff in a can. Different than that abomination they put on the sub.
 

sezwho

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Yeah. I figured you meant the stuff in a can. Different than that abomination they put on the sub.
Thats right, the memories crossed! I do remember as a late teen first visiting Philly, and a HUGE fan of cheese steaks, finally getting to the holy grail of Genos and being literally like WTF!?! I had worked at sandwich shops and pizzas places and I couldn’t quite process when they put cheese whiz on the thing. Later had great ones outside the city but still…
 

Dr. Gonzo

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Clamping down on Harden is pretty much the only thing, outside of a large amount of Celtics turnovers making the game close, the Celtics need to do win, right? Am I missing something?

Embiid can't compete in the fourth quarter and the rest of the team isn't very good.
 

PedroKsBambino

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Start strong, break their spirit in third quarter, and make the fourth extended garbage time
 

soxin6

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I have never understood how a place with a fanbase like Philly could ever be called "the city of brotherly love". The only thing the Sixers fans hate more than the Sixers is the Celtics and the feeling should be mutual. Do not switch off of Harden and blanket him the entire game. Embiid can't hold up against the pressure the Celtics are putting on him and will be out of gas in the fourth. Blow these fuckers out and then they can all cry together about how the world is against them, because they are.
 

Mooch

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Run these old, slow assholes off the fucking court tonight. Up tempo them into oxygen masks.
 

bigq

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It’s cute that the 76ers continue to list Embiid as questionable to play and a game time decision. I would put the odds of him playing at something north of 99.99%.
 

54thMA

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This series is killing me!
I was at a convention in Trevose this past weekend, was in the hotel bar Friday night with the Celtics/Sixers game on one TV, Red Sox/Phillies on the other.

I did my best to keep a low profile.......................;).

Hope you are well.
 

jablo1312

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Sep 20, 2005
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Just come out and execute. I've been harping on this constantly but minimize reckless turnovers, execute the offense, live with the results.
 

Auger34

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Celtics are the better team. The Sixers are coached by a whiny baby. Fuck em up