Ime Udoka suspended for the 22-23 season

JM3

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Dec 14, 2019
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I hadn't heard the name nor did I know anything about her.

I also don't follow much non-basketball related Celtic stuff though
I had completely forgotten until this morning, but when I saw the name again I remembered all the stuff I had learned a year ago.

It's an interesting dynamic & it's understandable that Nia Long may feel a certain way about the protection the mainstream media has given her - whether she is right to feel that way or not, & to what extent the other person was a victim or culpable for her own actions, are complicated topics.
 

djbayko

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I had completely forgotten until this morning, but when I saw the name again I remembered all the stuff I had learned a year ago.

It's an interesting dynamic & it's understandable that Nia Long may feel a certain way about the protection the mainstream media has given her - whether she is right to feel that way or not, & to what extent the other person was a victim or culpable for her own actions, are complicated topics.
Also, the story we've heard is that the relationship was consensual until it eventually wasn't. So if I'm Nia, the fact that this other woman was eventually unwelcomely harassed at work is a big "lol boo hoo" and takes a backseat to her (and Ime's) initial actions, which caused me so much pain.
My bad, I had no idea her identity was already known.
Hers was one of about 3 names which I heard rumored in the early going. Since the major media outlets were being very careful in how they reported the story, there wasn't a lot of fact checking of her identity going on, so you had to dig to figure out who it was and even then risked getting the facts wrong if you happened to read the wrong source(s).
 

NomarsFool

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I haven't given this story much thought in awhile, but I was also unaware that the name was ever known. Maybe speculated, but i thought there were a lot of names (unfortunately for all the uninvolved parties) in the public domain.
 

ManicCompression

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Also, the story we've heard is that the relationship was consensual until it eventually wasn't. So if I'm Nia, the fact that this other woman was eventually unwelcomely harassed at work is a big "lol boo hoo" and takes a backseat to her (and Ime's) initial actions, which caused me so much pain.
IMHO, regardless of what happened, it's pretty F'ed to out a non-public figure like this and subject her to harassment. You don't know what Ime fed her ("I'm in an open marriage", "We're in the middle of a separation") or the context/length of their relationship (one singular indiscretion on a drunken night vs. a long-term affair).

It's not like this was done in the heat of the moment. She's had a year to think about it. It's pretty irrational behavior to decide that she specifically should be publicly punished now for something Ime possibly did with a lot of other women.
 

djbayko

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IMHO, regardless of what happened, it's pretty F'ed to out a non-public figure like this and subject her to harassment. You don't know what Ime fed her ("I'm in an open marriage", "We're in the middle of a separation") or the context/length of their relationship (one singular indiscretion on a drunken night vs. a long-term affair).

It's not like this was done in the heat of the moment. She's had a year to think about it. It's pretty irrational behavior to decide that she specifically should be publicly punished now for something Ime possibly did with a lot of other women.
I do agree it's weird for her to do this a year later. You'd think cooler heads would prevail and she'd be more focused on what's ahead of her now. By that same measure, no one else really cares anymore. We may be giving it way more attention than it deserves.
 

BigSoxFan

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The problem with Nia’s actions is that the other woman’s spouse, kids, etc. all could suffer from her actions. This does them no good and they were innocent parties here as well. It may have been personally gratifying but it’s still a selfish act.
 

JM3

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The problem with Nia’s actions is that the other woman’s spouse, kids, etc. all could suffer from her actions. This does them no good and they were innocent parties here as well. It may have been personally gratifying but it’s still a selfish act.
I'm sure literally everyone who knows them already knows. All you have to do is Google "Ime Udoka mistress" & there are articles dating back a year naming names.

Just because the Celtics never announced it & people here have generally been respectful of that privacy in here, doesn't mean this is new news.

Probably not the best way to get across her point, but idk.
 

BigSoxFan

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I'm sure literally everyone who knows them already knows. All you have to do is Google "Ime Udoka mistress" & there are articles dating back a year naming names.

Just because the Celtics never announced it & people here have generally been respectful of that privacy in here, doesn't mean this is new news.

Probably not the best way to get across her point, but idk.
Not even remotely the point I was making.

Bringing this back up can open up old wounds that are trying to heal. I deal with survivors of gun violence as part of my work. Every time there is a shooting, it brings back trauma from their experience. If you’re the spouse, kids, etc. you likely have strong emotions about the whole situation, stuff that you’re still dealing with. Bringing this back into the news cycle can bring all that back.

Nia wasn’t considering the other victims when she did this.

I don’t blame her for being upset, bitter, etc. but it remains a selfish act.
 

JM3

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Not even remotely the point I was making.

Bringing this back up can open up old wounds that are trying to heal. I deal with survivors of gun violence as part of my work. Every time there is a shooting, it brings back trauma from their experience. If you’re the spouse, kids, etc. you likely have strong emotions about the whole situation, stuff that you’re still dealing with. Bringing this back into the news cycle can bring all that back.

Nia wasn’t considering the other victims when she did this.

I don’t blame her for being upset, bitter, etc. but it remains a selfish act.
Yeah that's all completely fair. In retrospect my comment is more directed at the previous posts & I conflated yours with those.
 

EvilEmpire

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Nia Long has no obligation to bury her feelings. Not to her ex, his former mistress, or the family of the former mistress. She and her kid were hurt terribly in a very public way.

Maybe they're still suffering.

Instead of criticism, all I have for her is sympathy. Long didn't victimize Lynch's family. Udoka and Lynch did. It's completely on them.
 

BigSoxFan

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Nia Long has no obligation to bury her feelings. Not to her ex, his former mistress, or the family of the former mistress. She and her kid were hurt terribly in a very public way.

Maybe they're still suffering.

Instead of criticism, all I have for her is sympathy. Long didn't victimize Lynch's family. Udoka and Lynch did. It's completely on them.
I am completely sympathetic to her situation. But she could have contributed to other victims’ suffering with her actions, which was my only point. She is free to handle it however she wants. But there are often unintended consequences of actions like these that generally aren’t considered.

I hope she is getting help, in whatever form she needs, to deal with the pain. Same with their kid. The whole situation just sucks all around.
 

Reverend

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Nia Long has no obligation to bury her feelings. Not to her ex, his former mistress, or the family of the former mistress. She and her kid were hurt terribly in a very public way.

Maybe they're still suffering.

Instead of criticism, all I have for her is sympathy. Long didn't victimize Lynch's family. Udoka and Lynch did. It's completely on them.
We also don’t know if there wasn’t some triggering event that led to her doing that just now. I don’t know if there was or wasn’t or if
it matters or not. So yeah, I agree; it all sucks, I’m sure, and I don’t expect to know enough to know, which is, well, fine.
 

HomeRunBaker

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I'm sure literally everyone who knows them already knows. All you have to do is Google "Ime Udoka mistress" & there are articles dating back a year naming names.

Just because the Celtics never announced it & people here have generally been respectful of that privacy in here, doesn't mean this is new news.

Probably not the best way to get across her point, but idk.
Who is googling "Ime Udoka mistress" after the first week or two of the story though? We've got some of the most passionate Celtics fans in Celtic Nation on this board and a bunch of us didn't know....why would casuals? My point remains, for these reason, that the Celtics PR team nailed this one.
 

JM3

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Who is googling "Ime Udoka mistress" after the first week or two of the story though? We've got some of the most passionate Celtics fans in Celtic Nation on this board and a bunch of us didn't know....why would casuals? My point remains, for these reason, that the Celtics PR team nailed this one.
Because that's how existing in society tends to work. It's not relevant to our lives as Celtics fans who it was.

But I'm sure it is very relevant gossip to people who know her & her family. My point was that people who know her, already know, & Nia Long Tweeting the name won't be new news as a result.

Not sure if the Celtics PR team did great on this or not. But they didn't release the name which seems like a super easy & not complicated choice.
 

Cellar-Door

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While I do feel bad for Nia Long that her long time (apparently well known in circles) cheating dog of a fiance, cheated on her again, then behaved in such a way that the affair became public, which embarrassed her......

She's posting the woman's name so her significant social media following will look for and try to harrass the woman, that's the goal, and why it doesn't matter that the woman's name was leaked earlier, it's a textbook case of how people with sizeable social media followings use that to harass people with whom they have personal (or professional) issues.
 

reggiecleveland

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Nia Long has no obligation to bury her feelings. Not to her ex, his former mistress, or the family of the former mistress. She and her kid were hurt terribly in a very public way.

Maybe they're still suffering.

Instead of criticism, all I have for her is sympathy. Long didn't victimize Lynch's family. Udoka and Lynch did. It's completely on them.
Sure, but the Celtics were in a no win situation. What do you really say if you are a team rep calling her? Can you apologize and admit responsibility? She could have the same tirade if they did call her, "And they dared to call me AFTER they let this happen!!! Would they invade the privacy of a white woman at a time like that?! Like I need the Boston Celtics to help me!" For her to insinuate the Celtics would have stopped it or let him keep his job had he had an affair with black woman is unfair. She is a wealthy celebrity with far more clout and ability to get her way than the women she claims got special treatment.. I agree she has been hurt and can say what she wants, but it doesn't mean she is being reasonable or fair to everyone.
 

EvilEmpire

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I didn't say the Celtics did anything wrong. I think they handled the situation well and said so as the situation developed.

They handled it well for the organization. Did the right thing even though it may have cost them a championship.

Did they handle it well for Long? I have no idea. Not sure it was possible to do both in an equally effective manner. So she can feel however she wants about that and I don't think it is unfair or unreasonable.
 

NomarsFool

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Did they handle it well for Long? I have no idea. Not sure it was possible to do both in an equally effective manner. So she can feel however she wants about that and I don't think it is unfair or unreasonable.
At the end of the day, Long is not their employee.