1. If you've got years of managing staff, you know full well that the context you (Dolphins fan) is seeking is completely and utterly irrelevant. Even if the OL as a unit consistently engaged in such "ribald banter", what Incognito did (assuming Schefter/others are correct and that voicemail/text was sent to Martin) constitutes workplace harassment and would get any supervisor and/or employee at the very least suspended, if not terminated. I totally understand Dolphins fans desperately wanting this to be a "boys being boys" situation....it's past that point now. There is no way that the "context" you're looking for is going to matter. What matters is what was said and what can be proven. And if Incognito sent that voicemail and ANYONE in the Dolphins organization knew about it...well, you've got years of "managing staff"...what do you think is going to happen?
2. You are dangerously close to the "she was askin for it with that short skirt" defense here. I am positive that's not your intent but it does not matter AT ALL if Martin attempted suicide or not. That you are using the allegations of Incognito's father (who is clearly unhinged and mentally ill himself, if he wrote that disgusting and awful shit posted earlier in the thread) as evidence suggests that you're not thinking about this rationally. As is that douchebag Kouffman you quoted at length, with the BS about Martin's family.
Let's put it simply - regardless of Martin's mental status, what Incognito (allegedly) did broke several workplace laws. Yes, the NFL is not a usual workplace, which is why Incognito is still employed today. In just about every other employment situation, a co-worker who threatens the life of another co-worker is terminated, with possible criminal charges to ensue. It doesn't matter if Martin was the most suicidal person in the history of the world - it is not Martin's actions that matter in this situation. The Dolphins would be really smart to pay him while he's on the NFI list and make this part of it a non-issue, regardless of whether Martin has "Harvard educated litigators" in his family or not. If Incognito threatened Martin (using "I'll kill you") and threatened Martin's family, it isn't going to matter if Martin is related to Alan fucking Dershowitz. This ceased to be about Martin the moment he notified team personnel (ANY team personnel) of the contents of the voicemail.
As for why Martin "hung out" with Incognito - that's on Joe Philbin and the coaching staff for making Incognito a "team leader". As you suggest, it's rarely cut & dried when analyzing behavior but it's easy to draw the inference that Martin - rookie/2nd year player - was told to "follow" Incognito - veteran and "team leader". If Martin said to his position coach, "hey, this guy makes me feel uncomfortable" it isn't outrageous to surmise that a coach told him to "toughen up" and follow Incognito's example.
3. It is hard for me to believe a guy as smart and sensitive as Martin reportedly is did not mention this to someone - a coach, a trainer, someone. And that's where it gets dicey for the Dolphins. If Martin told a position coach and that person failed to report it to Philbin, that position coach has put the organization in real hot water, legally. If Martin told Philbin and Philbin did nothing, Philbin is DONE as a coach. And if Martin's allegation got to Ireland - even secondhand - and Ireland did nothing, I expect the NFL to drop the motherfucking hammer on the whole team, including Ireland.
Andrew Abramson