Schefter Says Something Unlikely About a Center and a Paper Clip

[Hendu for Kutch]

And yet, despite the fact that he has no time to put this straightened paper clip away (...somewhere?) after he touches the ball with it, I don't recall reading any reports of opposing players getting scratched up or sustaining tiny puncture wounds.  Which is odd considering how they're crashing into this guy with such force.  Or are we supposed to believe that this player closed his fist around the paper clip and played one-handed after each snap?
 
It would be nice if reporters were forced to actually think through what they're writing before they publish it.

 

[( . ) ( . ) and (_!_)]

And yet, despite the fact that he has no time to put this straightened paper clip away (...somewhere?) after he touches the ball with it, I don't recall reading any reports of opposing players getting scratched up or sustaining tiny puncture wounds.  Which is odd considering how they're crashing into this guy with such force.  Or are we supposed to believe that this player closed his fist around the paper clip and played one-handed after each snap?
 
It would be nice if reporters were forced to actually think through what they're writing before they publish it.

 
I agree this whole thing is extremely far fetched.  But couldn't he just like drop it on the ground?  It's only a paper clip, I'm sure he could get a new one and with all the people stepping on the turf/grass it might never be found.

 

[Hendu for Kutch]

 
I agree this whole thing is extremely far fetched.  But couldn't he just like drop it on the ground?  It's only a paper clip, I'm sure he could get a new one and with all the people stepping on the turf/grass it might never be found.

 
Ya, but then he's leaving evidence behind.  So now, if even one person sees him doing it, which is likely at some point given how many people on the field are focused on the ball before it's snapped, they can walk over and prove the cheating with no problem.  That's a humongous risk for such a small payoff. 
 
That's basically the whole thing in a nutshell.  You can't be clandestine in front of a million people, especially at the point of their focus.  If you were to attempt to do so, there'd have to be a much better payoff than this.

 

[FL4WL3SS]

Nevermind the fact that you can't even take air out of a football with a paperclip. An inflation needle has a hole in it so that when it's inserted the air goes through the inside of the needle and not outside the needle. If you insert a paperclip, the rubber will just grip the paperclip and it'll work like a cork. You'd have to have a pretty strong paperclip to maneuver it so that it can let out air around the sides of the paperclip. I highly doubt you'd be able to get enough air out of the ball in the few seconds the long snapper handles the ball to make a difference.
 
This story is ridiculous. Schefter should be ashamed of himself.

 

[troparra]

 
I'm having a hard time imagining how a long snapper could let some air out of a football with a paper clip before snapping it. Does he run up to the line of scrimmage, sort of hide the paper clip with one hand while inserting it with the other (so the defense and officials can't see) let a bit air out, remove the clip and grip the ball for the snap? That doesn't seem feasible.

 
He swallows and regurgitates it, Hannibal Lecter style. 

 

[( . ) ( . ) and (_!_)]

[SIZE=14.6666669845581px]The paper clip ninja/long snapper idea is crazy, but I'm surprised the backup QB reference hasn't caught more traction.  That is a much more believable scenario.  There would need to be some shadiness between the backup and the ball boy holding the bag of balls (who is an NFL employee, not a team guy).  But this takes a lot less mental gymnastics then the long snapper with a paper clip.[/SIZE]

 

[GeorgeCostanza]

Nevermind the fact that you can't even take air out of a football with a paperclip. An inflation needle has a hole in it so that when it's inserted the air goes through the inside of the needle and not outside the needle. If you insert a paperclip, the rubber will just grip the paperclip and it'll work like a cork. You'd have to have a pretty strong paperclip to maneuver it so that it can let out air around the sides of the paperclip. I highly doubt you'd be able to get enough air out of the ball in the few seconds the long snapper handles the ball to make a difference.
 
This story is ridiculous. Schefter should be ashamed of himself.

I'm happy you agree with me.

 

[IdiotKicker]

Good thing SoSH has a punter.  I swear to God, if there was a news story about the manhood rite of some remote tribe in Paupa New Guinea, there would be someone here who could say "Oh yeah, I did it, and the thing is..."
 
So, Chuck Z:
 
What would be the benefit of this?
 
I can think of two potentially: the snap would be easier for the punter to field (??), and the ball would be a little softer, which might help with control/direction (??)
 
But then, it wouldn't go as far (???)

It doesn't really make any sense to me. As a punter/kicker, you want a firmer ball so that more of the energy is transferred through the kick, as opposed to being absorbed by a softer ball.

Could it help with control of snaps? Yeah, but if a long snapper needs to deflate a ball to snap it well, he shouldn't be anywhere near the NFL.

I'm not saying I don't buy it, but it doesn't pass the sniff test for me as far as being useful in any way, and so I have some doubts as to the validity of it.

 

[FL4WL3SS]

I'm happy you agree with me.

Holy shit, yeah, definitely stole your idea. My bad, should have read through.

Great minds etc etc